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Scared and Guilty - September 17th 2022, 08:35 PM

Hi All,

I'm 14 and my Mom is 55 and one day about 3 months ago I went through her room to look for my birthday gift and in her drawer found her bullet vibrator. I feel guilty now because I've been using it but earlier today I broke it and I don't want her knowing I've used it or went into her room. How can I fix this I need help ASAP

THANK YOU
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 17th 2022, 10:02 PM

Hello,

Welcome to Teenhelp. Thank you so much for joining us and telling us about what you have been going through. You may be embarrassed to tell your mother, I think it is a good idea to try telling her what has happened. If you are not able to talk to her face to face then would you be able to try writing her a letter and say what has happened. You can start with, hi mom, I have something to tell you and it is very hard for me and I may be embarrassed about this and then just say what you told us. You can put the letter for her to find. I hope you will be okay soon.


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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 17th 2022, 10:59 PM

well I don't want her to know at 14 im mastur@ting
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 17th 2022, 11:49 PM

Hello,
I think you must be scandalized about that.
For me, the best thing to do is to forget what happened.
At least you can try to talk about it with her when you two are alone. These discussion are better if no-one else will listen.
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 18th 2022, 12:16 AM

she will find out next time she uses it
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 18th 2022, 04:26 AM

Ugh, that's not helpful. Guess then the first option is the only way. Forget what happened. May be stupid, but at the end our parents did what we will do. Of course, she did things as the female part. But how you can reply to that?
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 18th 2022, 09:42 AM

Hi,

Your mother is going to find this and when she see's this is broken, she is going to know that someone was using this. I know it is hard talking to our parents about different things, it is better to be honest so she doesn't get upset. Try writing her a letter so that you can say what has happened.


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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 20th 2022, 07:48 PM

Well i did the letter and lets just say it didnt go well
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 20th 2022, 09:04 PM

Hi Addie, thanks for reaching out. I'm so sorry that I couldn't get to this thread sooner and provide my own advice to you. I can definitely understand how you didn't want to tell your mother about snooping through her room, using her vibrator, and consequently breaking it. You're at an age where it's ok to be curious about these sort of things, and I imagine you were surprised at finding out your mother (who's in her 50s) has one of these.

I am not sure if writing a letter was the right way to go about it, and I wish I was able to respond sooner to provide my input. I was away all weekend and then came down with a cold. Anyways, I think it would've been better if you had a face to face conversation with your mother and explained everything to her. I believe she would've gotten upset either way; but at least you were taking the mature route with addressing the situation.

I don't know your mother and I don't know the sort of relationship you have with her. I don't know how she reacted and I hope you are safe now. I don't like using the "God punish you" or "well, this is a lesson well learnt!" because they're so archaic. They basically promote the treatment children and adolescent got way back when but are unacceptable today. To put it short, I hope you've realized that this was a mistake and you will not do it again.

Maybe in a while — wait at least a couple weeks — you can sit down with your mother again and explain to her how you've been 'feeling' and that's what led you to use the vibrator. That is, if you understand what they're intended for. Otherwise, I would just stay away from that until you're a little bit older.

Again, I'm so sorry I couldn't get to this sooner and provide helpful insight.
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 22nd 2022, 11:50 AM

Hi,

I am so sorry that after you wrote your mother the letter, it did not go well for you when she talked to you. Sometimes it can be hard to talk to our parents about anything that we are going through and it can be easier to write a letter about all of this and then give it to them because we are feeling different things and when we are writing this all down in a letter we are not forgetting anything or leaving anything out. If you want to try talking with your mother in a few days about this you can or you don't have to. I hope you will be okay soon and everything calms down soon for you. You are welcome to post in the support forums and ask questions about this or help with this or anything else that you would like some help with.


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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 24th 2022, 11:02 PM

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]how did she react[/size][/color][/font]
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 25th 2022, 02:10 PM

she called me some words and screamed at me and still hasn't talked to me yet really.
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 26th 2022, 01:09 PM

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]i would have thought that she should understand especially since she was a teen at one point too probably doing the same thing. maybe when things calm down you can talk to her about getting your own things? best of luck![/size][/color][/font]
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Re: Scared and Guilty - September 26th 2022, 01:16 PM

lol you are funny
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