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Pregnancy and Childcare If you're pregnant, a young parent, or have questions related to either, ask them here!

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Gidig Offline
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I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 17th 2018, 06:21 AM

My fiance and I have been trying to get pregnant for a while after I had an ectopic pregnancy. I had a positive test a few weeks ago and figured I just needed to go into surgery again. After a few stops by the doctor I got a decently clear picture of a very tiny baby and a strong heartbeat! I'm not telling many people since I'm still only 7 weeks along, but I am beyond excited!

I feel like shit - which I've been told is a good sign. But I'm also struggling with crazy pregnancy hormones on top of bipolar. Luckily I was already on a medication that is safe to take during pregnancy.
Unfortunately, my fiance and I are still living with my family. Our plan was to save up to just be able to buy a house instead of wasting money renting (which in Colorado is extremely unaffordable - but moving away is not an option). I feel like my budgeting skills are shit and while I'm still ecstatic, I feel like I'm going to be a shit mom because i really I really suck at being an adult. Im at a high risk for post partum. It also makes me really really sad that my dad isnt here for all of this. As crazy as he was, he woild have been the most excited for me. And now with these hormones, it literally feels like I'm dying when I'm upset. My fiance says it's just being crazy from pregnancy, but these are all very real concerns as well.
I also still want to have our wedding next summer, because I don't think we ever will if we're focusing on raising a tiny person. While this can cost quite a bit, we don't need an intense thing.


But again, I've never been so happy in my whole life. I'm not sure what I'm looking for in this post - I guess I want to share my news with the whole world and maybe any pregnancy advise at all would be helpful. Everyone is taking my bitching as not being excited or greatful which is not the case, but sometimes I just feel bonkers.

Thanks everyone!
Maria.



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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 17th 2018, 05:08 PM

Congratulations! I'm so sorry to hear about the loss from your previous pregnancy, but it's great that you were able to see an image of your baby along with a strong heart-beat!

Is there anyone you can talk to besides your significant other about what you're feeling, your extreme moods? You say you are at high risk for post partum, is there someone you can talk to now to help you prepare for coping when that time comes. It's great your significant other is helping out, and I hope you two are able to carry on with your plans of marriage. But, don't forget, if things get in the way such as this baby, it does not mean you will never get married! You might have to wait five or ten years, when you've saved enough and the child is old enough.

It's really something you need to discuss with your significant other. Don't think that you are going through this alone, because you're not.

Best of luck.
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 17th 2018, 05:24 PM

Congratulations and this is such exciting news.

You will be going through journey in your life throughout this pregnancy and this child's birth. Good Luck to both you an you Fiance and to health to you and your baby.
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 18th 2018, 12:48 AM

Maria,

This is fantastic news! I'm so happy for you. I have heard from a few people that just buying instead of renting is always a good decision as it ends up being cheaper in the end.

Let me know if you need anything at all!



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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 18th 2018, 12:36 PM

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

You won't be a bad mom. I think it's natural for young adults (even older ones too!) to feel they aren't very good at being an adult, but there's plenty of time to learn skills like budgeting. And I think every new parent has doubts, but I think it helps to remember that you feel this way because you care so much.

It's clear from your post that even though you are excited there are also a lot of other things going around your mind as well. You're not crazy and it's not just because you're pregnant either. But I'm sure with a little planning and prioritizing and talking to others (especially health professionals if you are concerned about post partum) I'm sure you'll do just fine


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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 18th 2018, 05:59 PM

Congratulations!

You're not going to be a bad mom. Budgeting is hard. A good practice to keep with your budget is to write out exactly what you have to spend in a month on bills, gas, and groceries. Write out what you'll make in a paycheck. Split the bills into the number of checks you get a month. Subtract bills. Subtract how much gas you'll use in a normal pay period, along with a little extra. A reasonable amount for groceries. A bit for savings. And the rest you can spend.


Mine looks kind of like this:

Rent - 600
LP Gas - 200
Utilities - 120
Phone Bill - 100
Gas - 150
Groceries - 150
Diabetic Supplies - $300
Diapers and Wipes - $35
Altogether it's 1,655 a month

I make $2,000 a month.

I get paid twice a month, so I need to take $827.50 out of each pay week for necessities. That leaves me with about $172. I put $100 in savings each pay period so that least $70ish to spend freely.

I hope this helps a little. It's actually really easy to follow a budget once you get used to it. A little trick I've found that helps is to take what you can't spend out of the bank and keep it in envelopes in a safe place, so you're not tempted to spend it.
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 18th 2018, 08:59 PM

Congratulations on the pregnancy! I know you will do amazing.


   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - November 28th 2018, 09:32 AM

congratulations!
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 11th 2018, 06:15 AM

Thanks for your replies everyone - I really appreciate them.
I have contacted my insurance to try to get a better idea of what kind of mental health services they cover/provide.

Sorry to have bumped this up, but I figured I would ask my other question on here as well. Does anyone have any ideas on places I could meet more parents/parents to be? Everyone I know has either 3 or 4 kids already, or doesn't want kids so I'm struggling to find people who I can identify with.

Thanks!



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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 11th 2018, 04:46 PM

I would imagine that your doctor/midwife may be able to suggest some parenting groups to meet others. Otherwise, you could try checking out public places in your area perhaps community centres, libraries, churches etc. as they may hold parenting groups and similar events.

Hope others can suggest things too


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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 12th 2018, 01:43 AM

Congratulations!!!!! That is so exciting.

I am heading towards 14 weeks pregnant myself.
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 12th 2018, 12:12 PM

Congratulations
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 14th 2018, 12:51 PM

Congratulations! It will be the most wonderful time in your life. Do not be too picky to yourself, it's just hormones for you. And a little advice about buying a home. When you settle down in a new place, don't forget about surrounding dust and baby's health. It will be useful for you and your child.
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 16th 2018, 06:01 PM

your happy feelings are absolutely understandable, good luck to you!
   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 26th 2018, 04:35 AM

Congratulations!

What exciting news.


   
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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - December 27th 2018, 11:15 AM

Congratulations!! so glad to hear.





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February 24th 2021, 10:32 PM

Cool! I am happy to hear the good news!

You are blessed to have a child. Take care of your self!

Your parents will be proud of you!

You can buy clothes for the baby starting today.

I'm so excited to hear the cries! hehe

You also have to deal with sleepless nights!

Do you have any names in mind?

I hope you feel better during the first trimester!

The baby is so blessed to have you as a parent.

I looking forward to hearing more news from you.

There is nothing wrong to be a young parent.

Woah, that's great news indeed! Congratulations!

Pregnant women have an increased amount of blood in their bodies, so it causes them to feel warmer than most people. Use a towel or and soft cloth between the heating pad to avoid too much heat.

I hope it helps!

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Re: I'm finally actually pregnant! - February 24th 2021, 11:42 PM

Closing thread, as OP posted over 3 years ago.


I fell in love the way you fall asleep. Slowly then all at once <3

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