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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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Dating a distant friend's ex - August 17th 2010, 12:51 AM

So, I dated a guy back in high school. Then, he dated a few people after we stopped seeing one another. I joined a sorority and met a girl who, at the time, in passing, told me she was seeing that guy that I dated back in high school. This was a year ago. The two of them dated 2 months at the most and did not go any further than kissing.

Now, I'm dating that guy. She is a distant friend, but I run into her at sorority things once in a while. Do I need to talk to her or say anything at all? Should I just leave it? Should I stop seeing the guy?
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Re: Dating a distant friend's ex - August 17th 2010, 01:13 AM

I think it's up to you on whether or not you want to say anything. On one hand, she DID tell you that she was seeing your old boyfriend... but it doesn't necessarily mean you have to return the favor. After all, you dated him first, and she didn't even date him for that long. Ultimately, if you don't want this to be any of her business... it doesn't have to be. If you feel like she should know, however, then I don't see how mentioning it would be a problem.

Why would you stop seeing this guy? Has he done anything that warrants breaking up with him? Some people are going to say "ex-boyfriends are always ex-boyfriends for a reason"... so if you feel like there's a reason why the two of you shouldn't be together anymore, go ahead and break up with him. If he's changed, however, and the only reason why you're thinking about breaking up is because you're concerned about this girl's feelings... don't. Oftentimes, there will be ex-girlfriends who still aren't over your current boyfriend. You can't let them dictate whether or not you date someone.





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Re: Dating a distant friend's ex - August 17th 2010, 01:19 AM

You only should say something if you want to, no ones going to make you. And like Robin said, you shouldn't break up with him. He hasn't done anything wrong, so you shouldn't hurt him like that. And if she can't understand that your seeing him, and she tries to get you away from him and so on, is the friendship worth keeping?
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