My birthday tommorrow, the day of arguments and being alone >_< Parents are working again and friends are all busy. Guess it's just me and my thoughts... I really need someone right now

I'm sorry things can't be different, I'm sorry I'm so useless, so stupid, for being me.

Pills and more pills and really, who's going to try and stop me.....

Had such a stressful day yesterday, was on duty at a football tournament with st John ambulance. We had a spinal injury and a broke leg as well as a few minor injuries.
The ambulance took 30 minutes to come for the boy with the spinal injury so I had to hold his head in the same place for the whole time. When I let go of him when the neck collar was on, my shoulder clicked and went all weird and now I can't move it :/
Also I've never heard so much screaming when the lad broke his...

OH you want me to move out, you say you don't even want me here...with what money?! You wouldn't let me get a proper job and have stopped me from getting money out of my bank account.

Yeah I don't want to live here any more, you treat me like crap, it's okay for you to throw things at me and scream in my face and tell me how stupid i am, but as soon as a have a "tone" in my voice then i'm in the wrong.

Don't worry i won't be here much longer, it's the end of my...

I need to get away from this away from the insults the screaming.

I know she's right, I'm pathetic and stupid and deserve it but I hate it, I don't need reminding constantly. My parents would do anything to get rid of me, I can't help being a failure a disappointment, I'm sorry.. :/

Goodbye..

Having such a crappy few days, getting more and more ill, losing everyone close to me, i was supposed to go to a party last night but i couldn't face the people, the judging.

We're starting to look at unis and our personal statements tommorrow, i'm kind of excited. I can't wait to just get away from home, away from the people that hurt me so much :/

Urghhh chest pains, headache, breathing hurts. Why am I alway ill lately, it's so annoying.
Going out with friends in a bit, not even sure if I want to go, don't know if they actually want me there. It's probably easier to stay at home by myself..

Everythings so lonely, everything just screams at me and proves how alone I am. I guess it doesnt matter if people don't read this, I don't know why people would.. It's stupid it doesn't matter.

I don't know what's wrong with me lately, so down all of the time.
I can't see myself here for much longer, I just can't. :/

Only a few more..It'll work this time.. Not like anyone cares about you Charli... it's not like anyones going to notice... Really who's going to stop you!!!