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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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  (#1161 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 28th 2013, 04:20 PM

I should stop liking you because I am not worthy of you. But, my stupid feeling can't.




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  (#1162 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 29th 2013, 04:11 PM

My bones hurt, I'm sore, I'm crampy, and bloated.

Anddd, I have to wear white jeans today! I'm a daredevil, aren't I? I just hope those work out.. I still have two or so days anyway.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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  (#1163 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 30th 2013, 03:36 AM

Why? Why? Why?


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  (#1164 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 30th 2013, 04:13 AM

I seriously fucking hate how jealous I get. I see a girl look at him or talk to him in the store and I get jealous and doubt his love for me. He would never cheat on me. He loves me more than anything. Why do I get so fucking jealous? I hate this. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.


When you can't find your way home,
and when life gets too hard to face on your own.
I will stand as a light through the darkness unknown,
I will walk with you, so you're never alone.
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  (#1165 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 30th 2013, 10:44 AM

Mum, how can I convince you to calm down?




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  (#1166 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 30th 2013, 11:35 AM

I wish I could do this right, but there is no right way to do this, is there? I'm sorry I said forever when I shouldn't have, but I wasn't lying. Maybe the world wasn't ready for us yet.
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 31st 2013, 08:07 AM

A whole ten minutes of sleep. I can't even begin to think of how ridiculous that is.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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  (#1168 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 31st 2013, 11:46 AM

Oh my fucking God, this period makes me prone to tears for no reason. Why do I have to cry? Why do I have to show my feelings in public even if I know it's embarrassing. Fuck it. I don't want to feel anymore. I just want to go back feeling numb and empty. Gah, Mum, stop saying I'm an embarrassment for the whole family just because I cry in public. I don't even know why I'm crying.




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  (#1169 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - December 31st 2013, 01:38 PM

Why am I behind in school? Why isn't the house clean? Why aren't your horses' stalls mucked? Why isn't dinner done? Why am I not out of bed yet?

Because I am not the only one who lives here. Because I didn't even want the horses. Because I was trying to get something accomplished. Because I can't handle it. Because I can't handle the pressure and I am breaking.
Because it takes every ounce of my effort just to crawl out of bed in the morning.

What's wrong with you?

I don't know.
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  (#1170 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 1st 2014, 02:38 PM

Thanks for complaining and yelling about how bad of a person I am when IM STANDING RIGHT HERE. That really makes me feel so much better about myself. And he's lying, I didn't do that. Why would I? And yes, I did press one button, but I fixed it, right? And pressing the button didn't even break it. It was your stupidity that did.


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  (#1171 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 1st 2014, 03:57 PM

You can be such a mood killer sometimes. I can't wait until you go back to school on Monday. Can't you just go with the flow a little bit? Instead of screaming at anyone else who happens to be near by?


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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  (#1172 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 1st 2014, 10:27 PM

My stomach's hurting again >.>


"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
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  (#1173 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 3rd 2014, 02:18 AM

Hey, dad, you know that mom would kill you if she knew your online habits. Also...those porn sites can cause some really NASTY viruses. This is a brand new computer for her. Don't fuck it up. I'll keep your secret, but only because I don't want to see her throw you out into the street.


I am the one who loved you. I am the one who stayed. I am the one and you walked away. I am the one who waited, and now you act like you just don't give a damn. Like you never knew who I am.
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  (#1174 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 3rd 2014, 05:31 AM

Great fucking way to start the new year....





From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
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  (#1175 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 3rd 2014, 05:48 AM

Really painful and prolonged cramps. I hate my uterus.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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  (#1176 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 4th 2014, 06:18 AM

I hate my grandparents and they hate me. I am the problem grandchild of the problem son. Merry New year to you guys too. Your welcome for your Christmas gifts, by the way.


I am the one who loved you. I am the one who stayed. I am the one and you walked away. I am the one who waited, and now you act like you just don't give a damn. Like you never knew who I am.
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  (#1177 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 4th 2014, 06:51 AM

Deceiving someone to get what you want is a very childish, immature, irresponsible, and horrible thing to do. If you want something, earn it.


"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
— Malala Yousafzai
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 5th 2014, 05:39 AM

I don't want to start school on Monday. They aren't gonna like me. Nobody likes me. They're gonna laugh at me. They're gonna ignore me. They're gonna think I'm ugly, nerdy, awkward, weird..
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 5th 2014, 06:33 AM

Oh joy, a nice argument with the entire family involved is a great way to start the year off.




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  (#1180 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 5th 2014, 11:02 AM

Feel like I'm swallowing my own tonsils. In so much pain.


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Re: Screaming thread. - January 5th 2014, 12:53 PM

Go ahead and continue to take advantage of people. What goes around comes around.


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Re: Screaming thread. - January 5th 2014, 01:21 PM

Well my dad is probably going to disconnect me from internet because i download too much... Well fuck you, ever heard of beini? You bring a wall and ill smash through it. Im going into an IT school mate concerning programing, computers and security. You think that WAP or WPA2 encryption is gonna stop me? Yeah, just continue thinking that mate...
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 6th 2014, 11:43 PM

Really triggered. Wish you were here.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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  (#1184 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 6th 2014, 11:46 PM

No, you're right, PMS doesn't exist. My fucking uterus is just bleeding like a bitch.


I am the one who loved you. I am the one who stayed. I am the one and you walked away. I am the one who waited, and now you act like you just don't give a damn. Like you never knew who I am.
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 7th 2014, 02:06 AM

I forgot to do my homework. Again. I guess I don't forget, I just put it off until there isn't any time left. I guess I'll just say it was too hard. But she won't believe that. I had over two weeks to do it. I didn't even have to give it to her yesterday, the day it was due. Great. Now I'm going to be yelled at in front of the whole class again. Maybe because she likes me, she will go easy on me. And hopefully someone else didn't do it either! I just really don't want to go back to school. I can't handle the pressure and the stress I put on myself. It breaks me down. I can only handle so much. I don't want this day to end. I need to finish that stupid book. That's just another deadline I didn't pay attention to. I've been just ignoring all of these and I don't even think about the effect it will have. What's wrong with me? I was never like this. Yes, I procrastinated. But not this bad. This is like a new low for me. I just don't care anymore and that's what really worries me.


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Re: Screaming thread. - January 7th 2014, 09:30 AM

You really thought that going "drifting" in 2 1/2 feet of snow is a good idea?


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Re: Screaming thread. - January 8th 2014, 04:51 AM

I have a headache. Yet another stress headache.

I know what you're going to say, and I don't know what I'm looking for but it isn't for that. I'm tired of hearing that you don't have the answers but I know that you won't ever have them. I can pull it off better than you think I can.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 8th 2014, 07:45 AM

Anxiety. Wonderful. Why can't my head just work right instead of against me?
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 8th 2014, 05:06 PM

We have less than a week before classes start syllabi would be nice please. Especially since I'd like to avoid dealing with someone and the earlier I know, the better.


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Re: Screaming thread. - January 8th 2014, 07:19 PM

Contrary to what you've gotten used to, sex isn't an obligation. If you think I'm obligated to do things, then I am in the wrong fucking relationship. Period.
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 9th 2014, 04:52 AM

I fucking hate you. I don't know if I'll make it through tonight without cutting. My efforts aren't working. I'm trying so hard to hold myself together but I'm falling apart.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 9th 2014, 05:50 AM

H i l a r i o u s that you're acting like I'm not stepping up to the plate when I should be or something. You act like we both need to be pulling 50% but it's all about you 100% of the time.
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 9th 2014, 07:53 PM

Since it doesn't look like I'm going to know in advance, if she is there I will walk straight out and drop immediately. Either you can handle 11 of us on your own, or you will let her teach it without you. There's a better chance of avoiding her now than there is in the summer.

I know exactly how I ended up in this mess I just wish that it hadn't happened. My program is in jeopardy and IF I manage to graduate from here, it's delayed, possibly more than a year! because you exposed me to faculty that treated me like s*** and didn't help when I asked for it and then allowed them to continue teaching after other people describe what was done to me as "abuse." without my prompting them with the word in any way.

I swear this school/program was CREATED for me, if I lose it because of you I will fight it

You have valid concerns, but those concerns DO NOT give you the right to say what you've said to me. The fact that you deny saying them at all is proof that you know I'm right.


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Last edited by Kate*; January 9th 2014 at 09:58 PM.
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 9th 2014, 09:28 PM

The baby will never have the pleasure of knowing you. God, this hurts. 8 days is all I'm asking. Just make it, please.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 10th 2014, 10:50 AM

What's the point of thinking positively and loving myself if everyone around me I have known would only make me feel miserable?

I want to give up on my recovery... I don't want to feel emotions any more if that can only hurt me.




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Re: Screaming thread. - January 11th 2014, 05:31 AM

Yeah, slashing tires is really mature, isn't it? Grow the hell up.


If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?
Years of tearing down our banners, you and I
Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts
Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first


The axe forgets, but the tree remembers
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 11th 2014, 06:42 AM

I love how you said you wanted to have a happy conversation, no arguing or any kind of downer, just a beautiful conversation. And look where that ended up. Yeah, so much for all your promises. When are you gonna start meaning what you say?
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 11th 2014, 11:39 PM

Quit shaking me off.
I'm your fucking girlfriend.
Or do you even consider me that much?
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Re: Screaming thread. - January 12th 2014, 01:08 AM

it was all fine while you were talking to us under the overhang because yeah, it was down pouring. the kind of rain you'd usually see in a (mild) tropical storm. it was cool having a little laugh about how it was barely drizzling when you left your apartment and we agreed and THEN YOU PROCEEDED TO RUN TO A CAR LESS THAN SIX INCHES AWAY FROM THE OVERHANG YOU SERIOUSLY COMPLAINED THAT MUCH ABOUT THE RAIN WHEN YOU WERE IN IT FOR ALL OF TEN SECONDS WHILE WE HAD TO WALK BACK TO THE COMPLEX



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Re: Screaming thread. - January 12th 2014, 02:16 AM

You have zero regard for anything I say. I'm not just talking out my ass here! Stop acting like you don't care, AND STOP PUSHING ME AWAY.
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