Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

[Dawn.]

I wish I wasn't like this all the time...

[Silvan]

I wish I was smarter and able to finish the course by myself.

[Dawn.]

I can't wait for all of these emotions to be over with.

[Kate*]

This review will be very interesting. The guy who can't sugarcoat anything hasn't had anything negative to say, but the atmosphere has shifted the last 2 days, I'm no longer comfortable and I'm sick of it triggering the shit out of me. I will never be good enough, and have given up on succeeding; even though the full-time will be available once he's promoted, we both know I have no shot at it, which means he's absolutely playing favorites, and I will 100% tell him I have given up.

Apathy and depression are setting in hard. Work has shifted into very negative, yesterday was weird, then I was triggered, and I've been off since. I don't know what's going on, but I hate it. I think I just want this review over with so I can talk to him and get it all out there.

[Dawn.]

I really, really hope this works out for me.

[Kate*]

An 8-hour Saturday because I agreed to stay before you realized you didn't need me, for someone I'm almost positive doesn't really want me to. Fucking awesome. Then a long Sunday and long and early Monday before I finally get a day off to do laundry. Adulting sucks.

[Dawn.]

Let's hope I can get mend the anxiety that I feel...

[Kate*]

As SOON as I get decent hours back, we hire?! I see how it is. The fact that you like me may be job security for now. But, if you think it means you can jerk me around or take advantage of the fact that I don't want to quit, you're wrong.

And for the record, I told you from day 1 I would learn if I had to, and just offered to let you teach me and YOU said you liked having me in the areas I'm in. So, if full-time becomes available and I say I want it, you can't use that as the only reason to deny me.

[Soda_Voxel]

CAN EVERYONE STOP MAKING ME FALSE PROMISES

[Dawn.]

I really hope this doesn't last.

[Dawn.]

This will teach me a lesson...

[Kate*]

I don't know why it's different with her, but your entire team is feeling it. So, I'm going to bring it up until you LISTEN and DEAL with it. You think we're slow and non-compliant now, wait until your entire team checks out or quits on you! And normally, I would jump on extra hours, but I'm already working 9 tomorrow and most of them are with her. So, not worth it.

[Dawn.]

I wish I had something to work on.

[Everglow.]

I feel really useless and stupid today. I hate not knowing the answers.

[Dawn.]

I wish I was more motivated and calm.

[Dawn.]

Lets hope I'm overreacting as usual.

[Kate*]

I got a therapist specifically so he didn't become my therapist; and it happened anyway.

Yes completely unrealistic expectations, that could only ever be met by robots, trigger the shit out of me. And I'm not exactly sorry about it.

I can't tell if it's the caffeine, nerves about work tomorrow for NO reason, or that I need a therapy appointment which I can't make because YOU can't get the SCHEDULE out on time!

I finally get a day off and decide to get up early anyway to adult and then come home and do laundry, then work an early shift Thursday. If anything goes wrong with this tomorrow, I won't go back to do it again.

[Kate*]

I'm ready for a day off, but 8-hours tomorrow first; and I don't see my favorite manager until Tuesday

[Dawn.]

I wish I had more energy.

[Dawn.]

I wish I wasn't so argumentative.

[Kate*]

Grow up, asshole. If that was a typo, you have the wrong generation; if not, you're a disgusting excuse for a human being.

Tomorrow is everything I hate about a shift, long, early, and on the floor doing markdowns while the scanners don't even work. Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll let me hang instead.

[Dawn.]

Today was simply a rough day...

[Dawn.]

I just have to remember that everything is going to be alright.

[Kate*]

It's pointless because you've created a culture where we can come to you with anything and you HANDLE it immediately. Anything I would bring up, we've already talked about, probably more than once. And they aren't anything he can help me with, it's stuff I would expect you to deal with, have mentioned to you multiple times, and it's taken care of. We don't need it in illegible handwriting. Plus it's a trap, and this is probably a trauma response. But, I don't care. If someone will get in trouble if i don't do it, then I will, but otherwise, you already know how I feel about it, and we can just talk about that.

[Dawn.]

Let's hope this sense of anxiety and feeling increasingly tired doesn't last long.

[Everglow.]

Feels like all I do is annoy people.

[Kate*]

Anything in writing will come back to bite me in the ass, so I was careful. He knows everything I could possibly come up with anyway, so I'm not digging my own grave. One day off before a 17-hour combined weekend is NOT ENOUGH, I'm hungry and we're running out of food I want.

[Dawn.]

Let's hope this isn't permanent.

[Soda_Voxel]

I can't even make progress and do things when I find the motivation and desire to do them because other people tie me down and hold me back

[Kate*]

What is the point of building big teams if you're going to pull EVERYBODY but me to do something else?! And I want this fucking review over with ASAP, so you can tell me for the 4th time that full-time will never be an option, and I can say I told you so a thousand times.

[Dawn.]

I wish I wasn't always this tired.

[Dawn.]

Urgh, why can't things go well for once?

[Dawn.]

I really hate dealing with anxiety.

[Kate*]

I don't see my favorite manager until Wednesday now.

And this death is hitting me differently than I thought it would. He was one of those extremely rare people who are just amazing and knowing him at all was a privilege. But, it means the world has lost a wonderful human, and it's triggering things I hate thinking about.

[Everglow.]

I fell over AGAIN the other day and haven't told anybody.
My elbow really hurts and has a huge scab now. I wish I wasn't so clumsy.

[Kate*]

I was told I would have access to that email "forever", but they switched companies and I lost access. Which means I no longer have the few emails from the amazing professor who just died. I should've sent them to my other account while I still had the chance.

The fucking car is dead AGAIN on a holiday AGAIN WHAT THE FUCK?!

This had BETTER fix the car issue that the company is being SUED for because I have a JOB that I NEED to get to, and this is RIDICULOUS!

[Dawn.]

Do I be proactive or do I step on peoples toes?

[Dawn.]

It's just one thing after the other...

[Dawn.]

I hope this weekend, I do what I need to...

[Kate*]

scheduled 7 days in a row, but at least I didn't find out until I was almost halfway though.

The only thing worse than 9-hour Sunday floor shifts are 9-hour markdown shifts. And after tomorrow, I don't see my favorite manager until Friday. "Working with me a ton" my ass.

Can somebody figure out and fix the smell in his office, so we can get reviews over with?!