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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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Question We aren't dating, but we are?? - February 2nd 2011, 08:00 PM

So, for about the last 2 months, this guy and I have been doing things together outside of school every weekend. We've gone to the movies, Starbucks multiple times, and gone on a few walks. I really really liked him, and we were starting to hold hands and hug a little. We are "together" in our friends eyes, but we aren't officially dating.
But now, for some reason, I don't like him anymore. I'm not sure why. We went to a dance this Saturday, and I left early because I felt uncomfortable with the way it seemed to be going. He wasn't being inappropriate, he just looked like he was having such a good time, and I wasn't because I felt so bad for not feeling the same way about him.
My problem is that I think I should probably tell him I only like him as a friend, except I'm wondering if I maybe do like him more, but something within the last 5 days changed and it actually is just me. I am sick with strep throat right now, and I have been not feeling well with allergies, but it doesn't seem like that would change my feelings for him.

any suggestions/advice? I really don't want to lead him on.


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Re: We aren't dating, but we are?? - February 2nd 2011, 08:16 PM

I totally understand what your going through. Me and a guy were "going out" and I really liked him I knw him for like 5 months but then I relised I didn't like him anyone something just wasn't clicking so we decided to take a break and we've both come to relise it wasn't ment to be. So many you just need to talk it out. So I think you should just tell him what's going on and hopefully he'll understand
   
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Re: We aren't dating, but we are?? - February 2nd 2011, 09:27 PM

Your feelings will fluctuate in ANY relationship, whether you've been with someone for four weeks or four years. =) Yes, being sick, stressed, etc. CAN affect how you feel about your partner. You may not want to commit as much time and effort to the relationship, and that can lead to your feeling apathetic or less "in love" with your partner for a short period of time.

I don't know if this is a temporary thing, or a sign that it's time to get out of the relationship and go back to being friends. The only way you'll know is to give yourself time to sort out your feelings. I would recommend waiting until you've been healthy for a week or so. That way, you'll know for sure it's just due to your illness. If you still feel uncomfortable with this relationship, talk to your boyfriend about your concerns, and see if you can rekindle your feelings for him. If not, then let him know, so he doesn't feel like you've led him on, and so you don't have to stay in an unhappy relationship for any longer than is necessary. =)





   
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Re: We aren't dating, but we are?? - February 2nd 2011, 10:14 PM

Thanks! Really good advice!


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