I wake up around 7 every day, open my door so the cat can leave and go toilet or drink from random places if he so desires, and then get straight back into bed, where I spend the next few hours trying to decide if it's worth getting out of bed, having a drink, eating something, putting on clothes that aren't pyjamas, and rolling a smoke.

Usually I get out of bed around 11, when staying in bed any longer seems slightly ridiculous, and in case somebody comes to visit, I want to look...

So utterly, completely exhausted.
Not very hungry.
Tired.
Fidgetty - I have periods where I can't sit still, even if I try.
Overly social, and then when people go, I slip back into myself.

But I'm so very tired. There's not even any good reason why. I'm getting plenty of sleep, and only having minor nightmares - as in, when I wake up, I know they're just nightmares and they're not affecting me so badly, I can go back to sleep and all.

I'm...

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Just after 9:00pm. I've just had a shower. I shaved my legs today. I also got groceries, a pack of tailies, ate 2 meals, and got exited from Tupu Ake.

So I guess I should explain the last 12 days.

Monday 29th October, after turning off my laptop, I had a smoke, then took a massive overdose. I will not tell you what, I'm not here to help people kill themselves. But I will say that every professional I have spoken to since then has called it a massive overdose.
...

Just got home Sunday night. I had the time of my life with my friends and my boyfriend. Jon and I had tons of people wanting our pictures, it was great. I guess it was a good idea to go as Cloud and Tifa.

Some of the cosplays were really great, and we went to some fun panels. The Miku concert was great, and so was the Mikako Joho concert. And of course, the rave was incredible. However, Nekocon did have its downsides. On Saturday night, when I was in line for the Miku concert, I...

...

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I am way in over my head right now with everything i have friend drama going on i have to choose a side cause my friends say if you are friends with her im done being you friend and same for the other one. I have family drama my family hates that i am bisexual they dont accept it and to be honest I rather be dead than have them not accept me. I am failing math i got 28 % on a test. I just feel useless and I feel like I am hanging on to a edge of a cliff by my fingertips and that i will fall off...