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Holidays Fun xD
Posted June 26th 2010 at 09:39 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
So far we're all loving the break, it's so good to be away from some of the stresses and worries that are back home in Scotland.
I'm falling asleep at the moment though, really didn't sleep well last night. After being woken twice (first by my laptop turning itself on for some reason, then by my brother having a violent dream and jerking around in his bed
) I took AGES to get back to sleep and kept waking up because I was having weird dreams.
I'm not entirely sure why but I'm dreaming a lot about my aunt and her daughter. In every dream I have with them, she's like, the enemy still, but I'm usually on speaking terms with her daughter (not especially close though, we never really have been)
Doctor says it's trauma, I don't see what there is to be particularly traumatised about, but okay.
I told mum and she's been so sweet about it. She told me that if I do have a dream that really bothers me, just to go through and get her (yes, even at 4am on her relaxing holiday in the forest) and we can sit in the living room together and talk and fall asleep on the couch so I don't have to be alone.
I'm sharing a room with my brother while I'm here but he's not really much company when asleep.
Aside from that it's been awesome. Had a good game of badminton, my dad is getting better, I think I'm too competitive when I'm playing against him though
I also sat in the villa for an hour myself watching a movie while everyone else went swimming since, as of a year ago, I suddenly developed a dislike of swimming. (In other words: as of a year ago, I developed a fear of my parents seeing things I didn't want them to.
) It's not so bad this year because they know about it now, but the chlorine makes my hair all icky. 
I'm now sitting in a comfy chair in the living room listening to music and waiting for dad to come back from getting shopping from the car so he can light the log in the fireplace and allow me a little alcohol (For the record, I'm not encouraging underage drinking, it's just an idea that I might sleep a little better!)
It's beautiful at night. If we're in at the right time we can see the sunset through the trees outside, when it's dark we light a log in the fire, sit in the dark and talk/listen to music/play cards and on some nights we'll toast marshmallows on the fire. Perfect family holiday I guess. And it's so different from what it was last year, when I was hiding in my room with my laptop, afraid to be around my family, ashamed really. I barely smiled and when I did it was forced. Seems like a totally different person, looking back.
But now that everything with that bitch I used to call 'aunt' is over, I'm so much closer to my parents and it's amazing. Fuck the psychological damage, she made our family stronger. We're standing together against her.
Depressing part? I'm 250 miles away and I'm STILL thinking about her, Goddess she's never gonna leave me!
I'm falling asleep at the moment though, really didn't sleep well last night. After being woken twice (first by my laptop turning itself on for some reason, then by my brother having a violent dream and jerking around in his bed
) I took AGES to get back to sleep and kept waking up because I was having weird dreams. I'm not entirely sure why but I'm dreaming a lot about my aunt and her daughter. In every dream I have with them, she's like, the enemy still, but I'm usually on speaking terms with her daughter (not especially close though, we never really have been)
Doctor says it's trauma, I don't see what there is to be particularly traumatised about, but okay.
I told mum and she's been so sweet about it. She told me that if I do have a dream that really bothers me, just to go through and get her (yes, even at 4am on her relaxing holiday in the forest) and we can sit in the living room together and talk and fall asleep on the couch so I don't have to be alone.
I'm sharing a room with my brother while I'm here but he's not really much company when asleep.
Aside from that it's been awesome. Had a good game of badminton, my dad is getting better, I think I'm too competitive when I'm playing against him though
I also sat in the villa for an hour myself watching a movie while everyone else went swimming since, as of a year ago, I suddenly developed a dislike of swimming. (In other words: as of a year ago, I developed a fear of my parents seeing things I didn't want them to.
) It's not so bad this year because they know about it now, but the chlorine makes my hair all icky. I'm now sitting in a comfy chair in the living room listening to music and waiting for dad to come back from getting shopping from the car so he can light the log in the fireplace and allow me a little alcohol (For the record, I'm not encouraging underage drinking, it's just an idea that I might sleep a little better!
)It's beautiful at night. If we're in at the right time we can see the sunset through the trees outside, when it's dark we light a log in the fire, sit in the dark and talk/listen to music/play cards and on some nights we'll toast marshmallows on the fire. Perfect family holiday I guess. And it's so different from what it was last year, when I was hiding in my room with my laptop, afraid to be around my family, ashamed really. I barely smiled and when I did it was forced. Seems like a totally different person, looking back.
But now that everything with that bitch I used to call 'aunt' is over, I'm so much closer to my parents and it's amazing. Fuck the psychological damage, she made our family stronger. We're standing together against her.
Depressing part? I'm 250 miles away and I'm STILL thinking about her, Goddess she's never gonna leave me!
Total Comments 1
Comments
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Hehe, aww, I like this blog. I sounds like you're all having a wonderful time. Happy for you Nat! ^_^. And ignorrre her, focus on your family and the good time for now, 'kay?Posted June 26th 2010 at 10:58 PM by Power Cosmic
