So I've decided to start blogging. I've never done it before, and I have no idea as to what kind of an audience will even read it, but I thought I would give it a go. I'm tired of complaining to everyone, especially my friends, so I figure I could complain to myself, and if anybody cares to read well then that's on them.

Last Friday, (2 days ago), I went with some boy scouts to do a service project up a lake/campsite area where we planted trees and such. While we were there, my dad...

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Sadness ,Disappointess and a blank soul
Doves ever roaving my zone
A far far of reach passion
Betrayal torturing the shreaded emotion
Promises of pain and traces of worst
All seen in future eyes of the speaking present
Memories left with the blade
Traces on hands and thies should be on wrist
Desprately reaching for exhaustion rest..
And a crimson tear sending broken 'hay'
To the friend laying in the grave of life,imagination...

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Y'know if I had saved my money instead of not making an effort I'd have enough for my new computer and laptop now, most likely? Or I could have enjoyed things a hell of a lot more and still be enjoying them. It's especially hard to not concentrate on this idea when you get texts saying people miss you but hey they're drunk so it was all just one big I'm sorry I was drunk, I don't mean it kind of thing, yeah?

-sigh- And I could come in with a super bitchy comment about sex here but...

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ok so i went to the doctors and they r referrin me to a theripist type place where i go wiv my family to talk to counsellors there who will then work wiv me to find copin mecanisms and ways to make me feel happy.

she also said that i sound like i hav depression no surprises there.

im so glad im geetin help.

theres light at the end of the tunnel now.
liz

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Tyler and I had a fight earlier over google chat. I think mostly we were misunderstanding what the other wanted to talk about. So I ended up crying and feeling like he didn't care (in the end I realized I wasn't really specifying what I wanted to go back and talk about). So I was upset and we were arguing over some little, unimportant thing which I thought was his fault and he thought was mine. In reality we were both trying not to argue about it and to talk about what we wanted to, but both of...

ok so i know its good that im gettin help at long last but i still am not lookin forward to it.
the doctor ( female) will be the 4th adult not includin parents that i hav to talk to bout my problems mainly self harm. i feel like im bein parced around like a object and i hate that feelin.

im really scared and nervous wat if she tell me i need to take antidepressents. u see a year ago i was prescribed to painkillers and i got addicted. im sure im paniking for no reason but i find...