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Black Lotus Offline
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Bad Grades and Parents - October 17th 2014, 03:10 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Ever since i entered High School my grades are going down in some of the core subjects like i am getting C's and, B's. My parents are angry at me, and always scolds me day and night. I told them that i will improve but they don't even listen to me.

They don't even let me to participate in anything like singing, dancing, games,etc I want to do what i like to do but they stop me from doing anything i like. One time my dad scolded in front of my best friend so badly, i cried in front of her a lot. I even thought of running away or even doing suicide but i stopped myself saying that it isn't worth it. My mom constantly shouts at me and keeps on omparing me to others and their grades.

I have become weak mentally, i don't know what i should do or what i should not. I envy my friends tht they have a understanding parents. My parents tells me to become a doctor but i don't want to be doctor i want to be a Interior Designer but they constantly nag me to become a doctor in future. Now i can't even think straight, i Don't know what to do with my life anymore.
   
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Re: Bad Grades and Parents - October 18th 2014, 04:11 AM

Hey there,

It can be hard when your parents are pressuring you to get good grades. I think you need to sit down with your parents and ask them what grades they expect you to get. You guys need to be on the same page and so you need to know what exactly it is they expect of you. From there you need to try and see what you can do to try and achieve those grades. There was a time in the past when my niece was getting some pretty bad grades and my brother was being really strict with her about getting them up and it took her some time but she was able to do it. So, there are ways for you to get your grades up you just need to work on figuring out what it is your parents expect of you.

Once you know what it is your parents expect of you you can go in and talk to your teachers about what it is you need to do to try and achieve those grades. You might have to put in a lot of work but with some motivation and determination I am sure you can do it. However, I don't suggest that you put it off too long because the longer that you wait the harder it will be for you to pull your grades up.

As for what you want to do with your future, you have a lot of time to decide on a career path. There are a lot of people who are in college and still figuring out what they want to do with their lives. There are even people in college who end up changing their major once or twice. It can be hard to decide what to do for a career so try not to put too much pressure on yourself. I would suggest that you do what YOU want to do with your life because at the end of the day YOU are the one who is going to have to live your life not anyone else so if you end up majoring in something that doesn't make you happy it could end up being kind of disastrous. Do what you think will make you happy and hopefully with time your parents will come around.

I hope that this helped and I am wishing you the best of luck.


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Re: Bad Grades and Parents - October 18th 2014, 02:16 PM

it can be tough when your parents don't understand what you want to do, and pile on the pressure on you. but just remember that you have the right to be who you want to be. A lot of parents don't accept that fact at first because they wanna do what they think is right for you. But what doesn't make you happy in the long run isn't the right path for you it's okay to rebel and explore your talents because a lot of people do it. Just remember, you're already trying your best. So keep calm, give yourself a pat on the back.. and say these lines to yourself .

You did good today.... and you've always been good. now its time to show the world who you really are.... no pressure.

just keep remembering these lines as your compass and you will eventually drum into yourself the idea that there's nothing that can take away anything from you, any of your awesomeness from you. You are your own individual and you deserve to celebrate your freedom .

i know it seems a little crazy, but your parents will eventually accept that you're someone who deserves her freedom, someone who deserves to have the chance to make her own choices in this fancy lil' journey we call life.

if you need any advice or just wanna vent or need a friend, i'm always here.


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You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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Re: Bad Grades and Parents - October 21st 2014, 12:47 AM

Hi, I am sorry your parents are being so hard on you. While I think it is reasonable for parents to have expectations of their children, I do not think it is fair for them to put so much pressure on you.

Do you have access to counselling? It might be good to try to get this if the pressure is causing you to be depressed.

You could maybe try telling your parents that you have been trying to do better. Perhaps suggest to them that if they want you to do better that you get a tutor for your classes. While this shouldn't be necessary, it might help to have someone to deflect the amount of pressure they put you under because you are telling them about tools that they can help you access to improve your grades and they might think "ok, she is going to do good now" and will stop blaming you or what have you.

Tell them that you have been struggling to improve your grades alone and that all the pressure makes it worse and that f they are serious about you doing better, thats why you need tutors.

You also need talk to your teachers and tell them how bad things are for you. Someone with authority in your life (ex. teacher, guidance counsellor) needs to know you are getting so much pressure pressure from your parents that you are contemplating suicide. They can help you.




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Re: Bad Grades and Parents - October 21st 2014, 01:09 PM

Hey there,

I feel you. I used to view my parents in a similar way until they trusted me more. The thing is, when parents do this, oftentimes, they are only doing this because they want the best for you. They probably feel that good grades and a degree in medicine will bring you a stable and well-off future. You should really just sit down and have a talk with them. Explain how all their pressure is not helping and that you do not think that being a doctor will make you happy.

PM me if you would like to talk!

Kyra
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