Pregnant.. I don't know what to do...

[OurLovesSublime]

I'm so confused... I found out that I'm pregnant about three weeks ago. When I found out I was so upset because I knew my boyfriend wouldn't want to keep it. He let me know all the time that he isn't ready for a kid, and if I ever got pregnant he would want me to get an abortion. I agreed with him at the time, because I didn't think I was ready either. But, now that I'm pregnant it's a totally different story... I feel so attached to it already, and want nothing more that to keep it. He knows this is how I feel, but won't budge on the fact that he doesn't want it. I feel so trapped because I have no job, no money, no insurance and I feel like the choice is his to make because he supports me while I go to school. But at the same time, we don't hurt for money because he has a really good job, and I know if I decided not to get it, he would support me anyway. I just don't want to do anything to him that he doesn't want though... We've been together for almost two years... I really thought that I couldn't get pregnant because there were so many times I was stupid and didn't use protection and never got pregnant. When I met him I went on birth control and thought pregnancy was something I didn't need to worry about. Then I skipped a period and had a positive test... I feel like this was meant to be and this is my miracle baby. I have an appointment for a consultation for an abortion on Friday, and I know deep down I don't think I can do it. I just need help, some advice, previous experience, anything would be appreciated. Thank you.

[BrittneyNicole]

Kristi,
I know you are thinking about your boyfriend here.. but this is totally your choice. Sure, talk to him about it, but ultimately it's your body and not his. Do you think you could afford this baby and give them all they deserve? What if instead of having an abortion.. you gave the baby up for adoption? Figure out what you want, and talk to your boyfriend, and decide.

[.kaitlyn.]

i know what you are going through. PM me.

[J&M's Mommy]

I think you already know what you want to do. If you do not feel like you could have an abortion; then its likely that you will not be able to go through with it. I suggest you and your boyfriend talk it out and you simply tell him that you refuse to have an abortion because you know you cannot do it.

No one is ever truly ready for a baby; no matter how planned it is or is not. So just know that if you choose to keep this baby that you are not alone on that notion.

[FranklinF]

go get on medicaid, start looking for a job, tell him he has the choice of being in the childs life, and if not boot him, if you really want to keep the child then do it, you sound like you have your mind made up, just stick to your guns,

i was in the same situation three years ago, i had only been with my boyfriend a short while, now we have a son, and just got married, every guy is different, but give him a chance when or if he comes around.

[jaz08]

Keep the child. Don't ever think of abortion. Sit and talk it over with your boyfriend. Take responsibility to your action. If he doesn't like to support you for the baby, then let him go but just keep the baby. Hoping though he would be mature enough to take responsibility.

[J&M's Mommy]

Its easy for you, or me, to tell her to keep the child and not get an abortion. But me nor you will be caring for this child. So therefore we support her decision and do not try and make her feel guilty for considering abortion.

[Allons-y!]

Originally Posted by AiyaKai

Please do not abort your baby. You will feel a regret like no other. This is a life. Do not think of this baby as an idea or a problem that might come up in the future. This is a child you have been blessed with. Aborting your child is means you are going to kill your baby. If you don't feel like you have the money, time, or energy to keep the baby, by all means you can put the baby up for adoption, but please. That baby is alive, don't take it's life away.
I understand what a difficult situation you are in, and how your boyfriend may feel about it. So explain this to him. I am glad you have thought this through. Don't get an abortion please.

It'd probably be better for all parties if everyone kept their opinions on abortion to themselves. It's not our job to tell her what's right and what's not.
My advice would be to go to the consultation--it's exactly what it says, just a consultation. If you don't feel comfortable with it, then by all means don't go through with it. Talk it over with your boyfriend as much as you can--there's no right or wrong solution here.
You might also want to go to a Planned Parenthood center if there's one nearby you. They can help you discuss your options.

[Bishougen]

I agree with Allons-y. You obviously care alot for your boyfriend and if he is the kind of person who would stick with you, it's more important than ever now that you tell him how you feel about the baby. This is something you really should resolve together, no matter what you decicion. Go to the consultations, get help and professional advice. Ultimately though, it is your body, I know it's hard given the situation but this is not a choice you want to be pressured into.

[BrittneyNicole]

I'm going to say this ONCE.

Please keep you OWN opinions out of this thread and do not make someone else feel bad for their opinions. If I see a thread that is out of line it WILL be deleted.

[OohLaLa]

Just do whatever you think is the best for you and your child.
We will respect your decision, no matter how difficult it may be.

[losthope1620]

in all honesty, who cares what he wants. its completely up to you to decide if you want to keep this baby. if you feel connected to it, then you should probably have the baby. dont be worrying about what he wants. its all about what you want and thats it.

[OurLovesSublime]

Thank you everyone for your help I had to reschedule my consultation for next tuesday... but I did get to see my little one yesterday and hear his/her heartbeat Anyway, I talked to by b/f afterwards and he told me that he would really like it if I went to the consultation, but If I can't go thru with having it done he'll support be no matter what. I told him I'll go but most likely I'm going to keep it. So, everything seems to be working out... as well as it could be anyway

[J&M's Mommy]

Thats great Kristi! I am glad that you two can find a medium ground. Its important that you all keep the lines of communication open completely so that you wont be having some huge fights. I hope that your bf will change his mind about the baby and that you all can be a complete family.

[mommieof2]

Sorry if i seem harsh...But it's your body and it's your choice to do what you think is best. If you choose to not keep the baby adoption is always in option. If he would support the fact of you keeping the baby and that's what you think you should do, then do that. I was 16 when i got pregnant the first time. and trust me neither one of us was ready for something that huge. But we got threw it and It's the best thing that has ever happened to me. It makes things harder having a child and it's a hard decision especially if you aren't ready. I think you need to sit and talk to him about it and let him know how you feel about not wanting an abortion. I'm sure he will understand. There is so much help you can get if something does happen between you two. If you need to talk pm me.