I didn't sleep well. I woke up so many times that I can't count them. My new flatmate snores. I just kept waking up. And waking up. And waking up some more.

Then my flatmate got up and had a shower. This wasn't too early, some time between nine and ten, but at that point I just gave up on the whole idea of sleep. It was obvious I wasn't going to get any more.

She left water all over the bathroom floor. Obviously doesn't use a bath mat. And hair, too. I'm not impressed....

New flatmate.
Positive: flushes the toilet, shuts the fridge, often shuts bedroom door.
Negative: eats canned fish (which is smelly), watches lots of tv, leaves water on the bench.

:/
It's so obvious how much I can't deal with strangers. Ever since she got here I've been freaking out. Unfortunately she didn't get here until late this afternoon, so my entire team will have gone home, so I can't tell anybody. Not that telling anybody would change anything anyway....

I'll be posting in HL about this in a few months. But I needed to ramble out my thoughts in the meantime.

The suicidal thoughts won't go away. I've been thinking about it most days. Even when I'm happy the thoughts are still there. About overdosing. I have the day set and everything. The time, I'm a bit more flexible with but I do have the day. I still have pills from when I was storing them before. I haven't been sick or had many in my disposal to add more, but I can't say that I never...