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This Is Just A Little Taste Of The Wacky, Weird And Crazy Thoughts That Make Their Way Through My Mind Everyday....

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Posted January 1st 2013 at 09:57 AM by Jannel

alright, well lately i've been feeling more worthless than usual and it's really starting to take it's toll.

my aunty has been more and dissapointed in me because this isn't my last year of highschool and although it should be, it isn't. its just been so hard this year

my grandpa passed away over the summer and that really threw my whole family through a loop, especially my aunty.

my grandpa was the chief of our band, he managed the whole entire reservation...

Jannel

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Okay.

Posted May 17th 2012 at 07:23 PM by Jannel
Updated May 28th 2012 at 09:00 PM by Jannel

Okay, so I have a lot to catch up on.

Like I've found out that both of my brothers are following in my fathers footsteps.
They're becoming just like him, their both spitting images of him, they're both well on their way to becoming child molesting, addicts.

And I'm sick of being pulled down by them, it seems like every time I start to soar, or just starting to feel better they get into trouble and I get dragged into it. Like I'm guilty by association.
...

Jannel

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Gahh..

Posted August 10th 2011 at 04:03 AM by Jannel

I need to rant, like seriously.
I'm turning 17 tomorrow, and tbh I could care less, I wish I did care less.

I'm still scared of growing up, and even more now that I have realised the pressure of my families name riding all on me.
My family expects/wants me to straighten out and deal with my brothers all on my own when I hit legal age and we all move in together.

And I know I'll be doing all the work, pulling all the weight, my older brother doesn't care about

...

Jannel

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I could really use someone to talk to.

Posted February 16th 2011 at 02:20 AM by Jannel

Lately I've been feeling like poop.
I can't talk to my friends about it 'cause.. well I don't really have any left. And that really sucks, and it's all my fault. I'm not a good friend, I can't give advice, I can't stay up all night with them when they're sad or need someone to talk to. I can't make them feel better, or do anything basically. And that's why they stopped talking to me. And I don't blame them at all.

I'm stressed out because my of my families constant complianing

...

Jannel

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Arggh. o.O

Posted October 1st 2010 at 01:49 AM by Jannel

Soo.. what's new?

I don't know if I said this before but I like my school, like I did like the school I went to before but this one I'm going to now is freaking sweeet, It's an alternative all girls school that's 4 days a week, 9 am til 2:30 andd a small class of like 17 people, and yeah it's pretty cool, I just don't like the fact that almost everyone smokes there.. >.>

Uhh.. what else, my uncle's being retarded.. and not going to the hospital because he has reallly

...

Jannel

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I'm so sick.. of you.

Posted July 31st 2010 at 04:48 AM by Jannel

I'm so sick of you always trying to accuse me of things i didn't do.

And I'm sick of you trying to punish me for the stupidest littlest things.

I'm sick of having to hear you scream and yell at anyone and everyone who crosses your path..

I'm tired of having to listen to your long and boring lectures that are so totally retarded and you're telling me stuff that i already know or Isn't true.

I'm sick of you trying to feed us lies upon lies. we

...

Jannel

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Untitled.

Posted July 9th 2010 at 08:59 AM by Jannel

So i've realized that my birthday is like a month away and im sorta starting to freak out..

I'm going to be 16, i don't want to grow up. And i don't want my birthday to come at all.

I want to be a kid forever, everything so much more easy that way.

And i'm scared to grow up.
I'm scared that i'm going to grow up to be a total failure; i know i'm going to have to do something in life but i still dont know.. i may not ever know.
I know i'll

...

Jannel

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Starting to live again.

Posted June 30th 2010 at 11:54 PM by Jannel

Hey people of TH(:
Well i have told my aunty's about the pregnancy and all, and everything's fine now :]
they're helping me out with everything and super supportive and it makes me happy to know how much they care about me : DD

Thanks for all the help you guys gave me when i was too much of a coward to tell anyone else, it really helped(:

Now my life can finally start to be normal?
The only thing i have to put up with now is my drunken uncle who can

...

Jannel

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Fathers Day. =|

Posted June 17th 2010 at 10:46 PM by Jannel

Umm.. Yeah Fathers Day is this sunday i think?
And i could care less, he could die for all i care.

And last night it finally hit me.
I finally know why i could never accept my dad's "love" i wouldn't hug him back, didn't like him touching me and just wanted him to leave me alone. And why i could not remember a thing from back then.

I think he like.. ya know.. molested me and stuff while i was younger.
Like he did the same thing to...

Jannel

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Wondering Why Im here?

Posted June 6th 2010 at 05:43 AM by Jannel

Well, if you are..
It's a long story but i'll keep it as short as possible.

My mom passed on not too long ago, still not over that. But when she left us, my family fell apart, she was our glue she kept everything under control and together.

Everything is just wrong, my dad threw himself into drinking, so did my older brother, so it was just me and my little brother there for a while.

it got even more heavy when my dad met her, she broke what was left...

Jannel

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