I'm so utterly exhausted. Spent the night crying and drinking and taking pills. Woke up this morning and was sick. That was gross considering the last thing I ate involved rice.

I ended up spending most of the day sleeping it off, and I still feel wrecked. I'm staying up to watch the new Lip Service and then I'm just going to crash and sleep some more. I'm not sure if it's related or not, but I keep getting hiccups and it's driving me round the bend. And I have no idea how to stop...

There are no words.

I just feel empty.
Numb.
Done.

I can't do this. I need to cut tonight. I don't care what happens, I don't want to be stopped.

I'm struggling so bad just now.
It's like someone's died. I can't stop crying at everything. I feel really sick and empty and I can't even explain it.
I can't do this. I can't just accept that that's it. I keep praying I'm going to wake up and it'll all just be a dream.
I can't come to terms with the fact that I won't be going to sleep with and waking up to texts every day. It just feels like it shouldn't be so easy to just give up. It's not easy anyway. I can't explain it....

Today has really sucked. It feels like every time I feel like I'm getting my life back on track, something happens to push me a few steps back again. Don't get me wrong, I know this is important and something that needs to be done. That doesn't make it any easier.

Mum reckons I'm acting weird, my brother's confused because I went off on a rant about how unrealistic happily ever after love stories are. I'm just sat in my room with about 4 times the amount of calories I should have,...

You get a free cookie and a hug if you recognise where the title comes from.

It's been a weird week. My brother and I woke up on Sunday to notes from the "Easter Bunny" saying that other bunnies were trying to invade his (her?) territory but to remain faithful since he (she?) has brought us chocolate every year. Mum still hides our eggs for us to find, and we enjoy the hunt, so we went looking and in the garden I found a mirror for me from "Looking good bunny"...