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Pregnancy and Childcare If you're pregnant, a young parent, or have questions related to either, ask them here!

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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May 19th 2014, 02:12 PM

(Edited) And a bit graphic!!

So I'm feeling really paranoid, but I don't know if I'm just overreacting.

I've been having casual sex with an ex-workmate - I'm leaving for the whole summer in 3 weeks so it's nothing serious. I'm not on the pill but we've obviously been using condoms.

Last week we had sex and he finished inside me for the first time. I noticed that there was some white-ish substance down below the edge of the condom, but it didn't look like the condom had broken. It didn't taste like semen (I know that's not the best indicator!) and after some investigation we concluded that it was either lube or my own, uh, fluid. Although I didn't double check if the condom was still intact. There may also have been some of his pre-cum near me.
Yesterday we had sex using an extra-thin condom and he finished inside me again. And I've been feeling completely paranoid ever since and I can't get the worries off my mind; I have no idea why.

Should I take the morning-after pill?? Or should it not really be necessary?? I'm trying to reassure myself that I'm just being paranoid because I haven't had regular sex in a long time, over a year, and I've always been more protected - no-one's ever finished inside me when I haven't been on the pill, even using a condom.

Am I just overreacting?? No idea why I'm freaking out so much. :/


Oh and I'm two weeks in between my period, which I know is a dodgy time, and that's not helping the worries.


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Last edited by Coffee.; May 20th 2014 at 07:10 AM. Reason: Merged posts.
                   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 19th 2014, 08:29 PM

You *should* be safe, providing that the condoms have been used and have worked correctly, but that's not always the case. If you're really worried you could always take the morning after pill, just in case. It's better to do something about it now rather than later.

It's always hard to tell with condom use though. Everything can get a little messy down there and you never know what is what, so it's normal to be a bit worried. I don't think you're over-reacting at all, it's better to be safe than sorry.

I would advise to get yourself back on the pill though, even if the sex isn't that regular. You won't have these worries again as you'll always be safe.



  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 19th 2014, 08:31 PM

Thanks very much, I need a bit of reassurance - no idea why I'm freaking out so much. I'm thinking I may go and speak to a pharmacist about the morning after pill, though it'll have to wait til tomorrow morning I think.

I know going back on the pill would help, but if I'm leaving in 3 weeks there's not really much point right now!!


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 19th 2014, 08:45 PM

In that case, maybe request that he doesn't finish inside you, just to ease your mind a bit more.

Hope things go well with the pharmacist.



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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 20th 2014, 07:18 AM

Personally, it sounds like vaginal fluid to me. I used only condoms for a few months with similar issues, but with no problems with pregnancy. As Taylala, I'd recommend getting back on birth control, even with this short-term relationship. You never know when these kind of things are going to start! In these cases, I'd still recommend condoms (if you haven't talked about your testing history with the man) but the pill would give you that comfort of ALWAYS having birth control. Does your country have a low-cost option?


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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 21st 2014, 03:42 PM

I think the pill is fairly low-cost but as I'm leaving on the 5th of June it would have barely begun to take effect in my body by the time I was calling off the (fling?? affair?? friendship with benefits??) although I agree it definitely gives that extra sense of security. We're probably only going to have sex another 3 or 4 times.

I had a chat with the pharmacist yesterday and felt a bit embarrassed about how sillily paranoid I was being, but it was better to put my mind at ease. He said I could take it if I wanted to but it honestly sounded as though I was probably fine. I decided not to, but I agree that I might not let him finish inside me, just to be sure.

Thanks for the reassurance guys, I have no idea where the paranoia came from - unless it's because I'm usually extra-extra-careful and this time I was just very careful. :P


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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 21st 2014, 07:39 PM

More likely than not it was vaginal fluid, which can thicken and change in color both depending on the level of arousal AND the time of the month (vaginal mucus is already thicker and stringier at ovulation; if you are using the family planning method they tell you to check for that as a sign of ovulation).

If it eases your worries, as others have said, don't let him finish inside you for the duration of your sexual relationship. You can take the morning-after pill if it's been less than 72 hours, but remember that its effectiveness level drops the farther you get from the time of intercourse. I would also recommend getting back on the pill if you plan on being sexually active at all. It's relatively inexpensive and will keep you more protected if you choose to have sex without having so much worry.
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Paranoid about getting pregnant... - May 23rd 2014, 09:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by DanceCommander View Post
More likely than not it was vaginal fluid, which can thicken and change in color both depending on the level of arousal AND the time of the month (vaginal mucus is already thicker and stringier at ovulation; if you are using the family planning method they tell you to check for that as a sign of ovulation).
Thanks - I'm hoping this was the case; we were also using lube so it could have been that too. Most likely nothing to worry about.
I'm not planning much more sexual behaviour for a while so it's unlikely I'll go back on the pill until I've made a conscious decision to become consistently sexually active again - this was a bit of a surprise to be honest. However I usually keep myself quite well-informed about contraception - there's actually a pill available in Ireland that's effective for five days after intercourse as well, which is handy to know about!

Anyway thanks again for replies.


Honey, you're familiar, like my mirror, years ago
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I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door
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...
Níl a shíltear mar a bhítear.
Things are not always what they seem.
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