I'm getting that urge to overdose. To just take stuff and not care about the consequences. I wish I had something for sleep. I have cocodamol. I don't think I want to die. But I want all this to stop. How many do I take? I only have two in my room. That's the required dosage, not an overdose. Paracetemol? Why doesn't any one in my family take anything worth overdosing on? I want this to stop. But I don't think I want to die. Not today. I did yesterday. I'm not so sure now. I don't know what to do....

Ugh.

What do I do?

I'm scared.

But I don't want to stop doing this. I want to starve.

I don't know why.

But I want to stop.

It hurts when I try to stop.

But I can't get help until I'm under weight.

Keep going, Hester. Go so far they can't help you any more. Keep going.

We were looking at different skies;
worlds apart, yet inches away.
We were close;
yet nowhere near,
you saw the dark,
i saw tomorow
Where are we now?
Nobody knows,
Nobody cares,
I don't care,
I walk alone.