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The life and lies of the so called schizoaffective, paranoid enby, Raphael.
If you don't know what that means, look it up. I hate myself.
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Well

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Posted March 20th 2015 at 02:48 AM by The Darkness

It's like I can't have happiness anymore.
It's been like 6 months since I broke up with Evan and I'm still crying at night and wishing I was dead.
Lana Del Rey can clearly depict my sadness.
I just have hit my low again. Hopefully tomorrow I can send a letter I wrote to him saying how much I hate him and how much he's hurt me because I cannot let him go on happy as he is without feeling guilty over what he's done to me. He can't go on and move on without feeling a little bit of guilt for making me feel the way I feel. I can't let him be happy and win. I can't let him win.
This vengeful kind of feeling came after I finished reading Gone Girl, I think. The wife, Amy, would think up elaborate acts to how she would get revenge on those who have done her wrong. Most would think she's crazy but I thought she was brilliant. I wish I was more like her and I could think up of wonderful ways to get my revenge and make sure I win. I'm tired of losing like a sore loser. I hate being a loser. I hate losing. I hate it all.
He can't win he just can't win.

"All my friends tell me I should move on, I'm lying in the ocean singing your song. Ah, thats how you sang it." -Dark Paradise, Lana Del Rey
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