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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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  (#4401 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 17th 2017, 02:40 PM

I cannot die. Full stop.


Do my best at everything I can to live a happy, perfect life.

Happy life won't come by being happy everyday. Struggle and always work hard.

Forgive other's imperfection, they will work hard about it once I point it out to them, just like what I should be doing.

On the other hand, never tolerate with my own mediocrity. Never slack and always strive improvement.

Never settle. Never give up.
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  (#4402 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 17th 2017, 02:44 PM

I hate you for how you've wormed your way in to my life, and how you've treated me so poorly. I just want you to know that all those times I've tried to do what is right, you've pushed it away, so now, I'm just concerned with you staying the hell away from me.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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  (#4403 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 17th 2017, 03:31 PM

I am freaking out. It's getting to a point where I don't really know how to deal with it.


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  (#4404 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 17th 2017, 05:47 PM

Done done done done done
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 17th 2017, 09:32 PM

I just want to scream. the voices are getting more and more fucking powerful and it's so hard not following what they say. I feel like i'm trapped on an island all by myself with only the voices to keep me company





From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
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  (#4406 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 04:05 AM

Seriously, fuck health class


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 05:40 AM

Things are changing. I've changed, you've changed, and I have no plans of slowing down, so you better start catching up.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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  (#4408 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 08:28 AM

I just want to cry. Im stressed and sick and i miss him. I just remember when we were younger and when i got sick he would alway come over and cuddle with me.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 08:32 AM

I haven't done that because if it hasn't worked in the last 2 years, I don't see much point to continuing it. I'm sure you'll be on me about something. I did most of what I was supposed to and didn't see the point of the rest of it. Not to mention we have bigger stuff to deal with now.

Considering I have to function tomorrow, I would LOVE to not be nauseous and sick

Why do I never want to go when it finally gets here?! And, please don't let me get sick. I got the email, I assume I have an appointment.

Medicaid has me paranoid again. 2 people told me this new person takes it, but I can't find her in the directory. Hopefully it's just outdated. I'll probably have to call closer to the appointment and double check now UGH! If I show up, you're wrong, and I can't afford my appointment, I'm blaming you! Of course, they take it, and they aren't listed in there either.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 02:54 PM

I hate how we aren't on the same page right now.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 03:02 PM

I feel sick


The risk I took was calculated, but boy, am I bad at math.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 04:38 PM

God, I am not sure if I am ever going to be able to trust someone again. I feel like a fool and you are not helping matters!


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  (#4413 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 18th 2017, 10:53 PM

You know what really bugs me? Rude people who jump straight to yelling at the world before trying anything else first. So someone is parked in your way? Why not ask them if they wouldn't mind moving so you can park up? Why do you have to park and then storm over to them and shout at 11pm that they're in the way? You don't know who they are. You shout at them and they can follow you up to the flat you share with us and knock you flat out. Be polite. The whole world isn't out to get you. You're just so egocentric that you think everything has to be about you all the time.

And if you've legally gained the right to drive on public roads the least you could do is do it safely. Speeding will get you hurt or locked up one day and you're going to deserve it. You're an unsafe driver. It's horrible but something needs to happen for you to realise you're in the wrong. Saying don't lecture me because I won't change is a problem. You're not putting yourself only in danger but innocent people who are unfortunate enough to be on the road with you too. You're an inconsiderate human being. I can't stand it.
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  (#4414 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 12:07 AM

Started a new second job and got fucked over by them. I know they see employee's as disposable but I was really excited.




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  (#4415 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 12:09 AM

On top of everything, I've come down with a cold. I have so many things to do but now I don't feel well enough to do any of them. How helpful.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 12:16 AM

Please fucking stop before you drive me insane.
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  (#4417 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 01:33 AM

This is just stressing me out more.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 01:58 AM

I cannot die... I must not die... I will not die...

I am very very tired, but its not enough to stop me from breathing.


Do my best at everything I can to live a happy, perfect life.

Happy life won't come by being happy everyday. Struggle and always work hard.

Forgive other's imperfection, they will work hard about it once I point it out to them, just like what I should be doing.

On the other hand, never tolerate with my own mediocrity. Never slack and always strive improvement.

Never settle. Never give up.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 03:45 AM

Fucking cut me off on my birthday. You're a prick.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 19th 2017, 05:40 PM

Even though it's pretty out, I wish it wasn't raining. Ava and I would love to go to the park!


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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  (#4421 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 21st 2017, 06:06 PM

She did a lot of her shit to herself and isn't even trying to help herself. Everybody goes running, enables, and bends over backwards while she does NOTHING but complain because the world completely revolves around her, no one can have it worse than her even when they do, and everything we could possibly do will never be enough.

Meanwhile, if I acted like that I'd be killed by the same people who put up with her. My entire world falls completely apart through no fault of my own and I was left to my own devices. Nobody came running, nobody enabled, and they sure as hell didn't bend over backwards or drop everything to listen to me bitch. In fact, it was the total opposite. I found the support I needed and pulled myself together on my own because I didn't get a choice! Why can't she do the same thing?! Age is only an excuse to a point, and considering how long she could be here, "tolerating it" doesn't seem like my best option, even if it's the only one I really have.

I know you like to be positive, but it feels like you're denying the seriousness of it. I know you don't like to think about this meaning that it's getting worse. Problem is that that's exactly what this means. You need to acknowledge the reality of your situation.

Here we go again, only this time you won't be there. If I'm lucky I can get a new person; in a month.


Just because I know how badly I need to go doesn't mean I want to.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 21st 2017, 06:29 PM

Ignored 2 emails and a phone call now. It's a job but I'm so nervous and I don't know why. Can't seem to make myself answer the phone.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 22nd 2017, 02:46 AM

I remembered.

Fuck.

I remembered.
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  (#4424 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 22nd 2017, 10:36 AM

Feel like crying all the time, but don't know why.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 22nd 2017, 04:42 PM

I honestly don't know what to do anymore. Everyone will just say: 'don't give up', but I'm wondering if it's even worthy not giving up...


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 22nd 2017, 07:10 PM

I'm less okay with this than I thought I would be. Hopefully you stayed close because following you is seriously a viable option.

Hormones are completely evil, benefits and welfare aren't a fucking picnic, and I hate humanity.

I'm 2 categories more disabled than I thought I would be. Good news is that I don't have to wait for services, the problem is that this is bittersweet as fuck.

It's official, he triggers the shit out of me. Next summer when I have to deal with him in person while also having to tell everybody who hasn't seen me in years that I will never be able to do what I was trying to do when they saw me last. is going to be a complete fucking nightmare.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 23rd 2017, 07:36 PM

Love the feeling of dwindling friendships in the evening.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 23rd 2017, 10:47 PM

I hate how anxious I've been lately. I have no idea how to over come this feeling, but I don't really think I want to.


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 01:51 AM

Just a regular complaint and passing thought more than anything...

I bet I'm going to be the only person who ends up submitting a really poor assignment. I really just don't get it at all. It's so difficult to understand how to link everything together, I feel like I'm going to end up failing. it's only 10% but it makes me feel like a complete failure when I can't do these things. The exam is worth 50%, I know I should worry more about that but I can't help but feel like I'm going to be seen as a failure by everyone because of it.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 02:39 AM

Im gonna get less than a 50% on my exam after 2 straight days of studying.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 03:12 AM

where the fuck am I gonna hide a bottle of liquor and two boxes of razor blades
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 04:27 AM

I fucking resent having a sleep disorder on nights like this. I can't believe I forgot to take my fucking medicine until 2 hours too late. So now my options are to stay up/try to sleep but fail 2 more hours until I'd normally take round 2, and hopefully get 4 hours of sleep. Or take it now, at 4am, set an alarm for 7 so I can take fucking birth control but probably throw up for interrupting sleep.

And no matter what it'll be too late when I get up to take my day med, which probably won't do shit to keep me awake anyways after such a terrible god damn night. I can't win. God help anyone who tells me how tired they are tomorrow.



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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 07:44 AM

I actually missed talking to you. You always knew how to make the day go faster
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 10:55 AM

I really need to concentrate but I am so happy about other things, studying is the last thing on my mind. UGH!


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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 02:41 PM

Had a dream about C AND J and I don't want to be awake and in public right now. Strange as it sounds I want to go back to sleep to have better dreams. Or at least escape reality. What kind of horrible things are you saying about me?
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Talk Nerdy To Me.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 04:17 PM

Ahh yes, blame me for something I didn't have the biggest part in. Just leave me alone mum, not my fault I underestimated thr best friend. Fuck off.




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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 07:28 PM

I don't know who did this to us, but I'm not sure I even want to know. I just want to be left alone, and I have no idea why that's so hard for people to understand.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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Outside, huh?
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 08:53 PM

Tired of everything in this house. Just want to move out.

Dreading m birthday because I really think most of my family and friends have or will have forgotten it. I feel like I don't matter to anyone.

Last edited by Everglow.; April 24th 2017 at 09:13 PM.
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 24th 2017, 10:12 PM

"Cut back on the therapy. We can't afford it."
BUT IM NOT A FINANCIAL BURDEN RIGHT
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Re: Screaming thread. - April 25th 2017, 06:13 AM

I hate you. I hate you I hate you I hate you.
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