Ever felt ignored? Like you're screaming at the top of your lungs yet still noone can hear you... Or they can and just choose to ignore you. That's How I am feeling right now. No matter if I am alone or with people I still feel so alone. I used to feel better been around people. Now I just feel worse. I feel like a fake. A stupid good for nothing useless fake. Pretending to be happy. Faking a smile. Pretending to be something I am not just to please them. I want to protect everyone from me. Everything...

I hate hurting like this, i hate being like this.... i hate the hospital trips, the lying to family and doctors....i hate myself for it all.

Cutting...ODing....suicide.... that is all the runs through my mind lately...when i can do it....how much i'm hurting at the moment. My head is spinning with the horrible thoughts... last night failed.... but still i want to end it all.

But i'm scared of hurting people...

the sun is very nice and veryy hot!
i've been out in it all afternoon, on a sunbed, sunbathing

even if i stay out all afternoonj and nearly turn to a puddle, i still don't get a small tan, which is really all i wanted from the sun.
who else does this happen to !?!

Does it always hurt this much to talk to people, to tell people how you are feeling... i keep telling myself it will get easier, but i think it would just be much better to keep hiding and pretend everything is fine.
My mom is constantly asking questions and when i am honest with her she explodes and tells me i'm lying or that i have no reason for this.....i can't take it anymore... i have it planned.....
........ Odsing and cutting are the only options now.....

I woke up this morning thinking about suicide. All I could think of was ways to make it look like an accident. I didn't say anything though. Instead I went to school and acted like nothing was wrong. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't keep hiding it and acting like nothing's wrong when all I want to do is cry. I just want one person to ask if I'm okay and stop assuming that just because I'm smiling there's nothing wrong. I just wish that I felt happy. I blame myself for not being happy. All...

hi, i am new on teenhelp , and well, i just wanted some advice on a couple of things, they may sound silly, but they are important and a big deal to me.
anyway i wont reveal much about me except my name is Georgia and i am 13.
thankyou for reading and i hope you will be able to help me with anyway problems i may have.

We occasionally have those good things happen..i passed my lifeguarding course which i am soo happy about!
But then bad things happen again, the depression kicks back in, the urges come back... sometimes it makes me wonder if the good things happen just so it hurts more when you come crashing back down to earth. It makes you realise that nothing good or bad lasts forever, but the bad things just keep coming back....

I can't do this anymore..... cut cut cut, pills pills pills..................

Coping? Really what is coping! Different to recovery or being happy?... i can't cope any longer! And if i can't cope that just rules out my chances of happiness anytime soon!
Sure i can distract myself, but only for so long, i can't keep going like this!
My family say i'm crazy, that i have no reason for this....if only they knew!

Maybe i just don't do coping... all i know is that it all hurts too much....

Sorry I haven't posted in a while it has been crazy these last 3 days. On Thursday, we got our report cards at school. I made honor roll. Praise the Lord! Also, my mom came back from New Mexico ( where the accident occured) and brought all the emotion back with her. So I was during the day and then cried myself to sleep that night. My mom also showed me a picture of what my aunt looks like now. I was shocked she doesn't look the same at all. On Friday, we had our PBIS rec afternoon its basically...