Had an ok weekend. Started lying about how i feel again.

Should be happy but for some reason i can’t. People tell to be happy. I feel like im incapable of being happy. I have a roof over my head, good parents, most the time good friends. And yet im still not happy. I guess my life doesnt think i deserve to be happy. Somedays i wish i was just happy like a regular person for an hour or 2. Not have my problems to worry about.

i’ve been told that im ungrateful because...

I missed everyone when TH was down. Im glad its back up. I hope everyone is doing well. I think thats all i wanted to say.

I thought i was getting better, but then today 1 little bad comment someone made to me i got depressed again. I almost started crying. Every little negative comment gets me either crying or wanting to cry. I don't know what to do.. Anybody have any idea's?

I still haven't had any suicidal thoughts for about 6 days. The thoughts of cutting are getting worse. Just want to see the blood, and feel the pain. Just have blood running down my arm. Just to make the sadness and voices go away....