I'm so confused about myself right now. Perhaps I'll just stop thinking. Perhaps I'll forget about it all and if I end up killing myself or cutting or starving then I'll have to start thinking again. How can things keep swinging from good to bad and back to good again? Is it just hormones? I swear to God I hope this is just hormones.

My nan gave me a letter today basically of things she's always wanted to say to me but has never known how. Some of the things that she said really opened my eyes to everything and made me realise i have to change the way I am at the moment, the one paragraph that keeps going through my head is this: 'Charlotte, I wish you knew how proud I am of you; there is going to be a day soon when I am not going to be here to tell you this but I need you to remember that. You are going to go far but...

Source: Notice | Facilitated Chat Room Discussions.


There are three scheduled discussions on the topic of substance use in the Chat Room for users to seek advice and share thoughts and ideas! The first discussion will be held at 8pm UK time (BST), the second will be held at 8pm Eastern US time (EDT), and the third will be held at 8pm Pacific US time (PDT). All you have to do to take part is log into the...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrkgV5bl7kQ

I've been missing Jimmy a lot lately, especially since I decided on joining the reserves and such. Jimmy was killed on his 4th and final tour last year. He wasn't even supposed to be on the tour, He went in his friends place cause his friend had a baby on the way. He stepped on a IED.
I don't know, This song makes me sad and happy. If that makes sense. :\

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
It's sucks. It will be my birthday in a couple hours and I have to go the hospital.
I lost my only friend, but gained my ex of four years. We are completely starting over.
And you know what??? I hate it.
Alan, was my only friend he taught me everything. He was my love and strength. I would give up Bryan(boyfriend) for Alan. Alan doesnt have a place in my heart. He became my heart.
My Family situation. I feel like I don't belong...

I was talking to some of my friends and I realized something, If I keep doing what I'm doing now, I'm going nowhere in life. I've made a couple decisions. I'm not going to let my dad run my life, I'm not taking Leda back, and I'm going to try and quit smoking.
I was also thinking about my future, I decided when I turn 18 I want to join the army. My friends aren't too impressed, But honestly, I don't care anymore. I'm going to do what makes me happy. If that means joining the army, then...

I saw Leda today. She said she wants me back. I have no idea what to say, She put me through hell But I still love her. Brent told me I shouldn't go back with her.. I don't even know anymore...

Found out one of the few people that actually even bothers talking to me at my school is leaving, she didn't get high enough grades. She was the only person who talked to me for months and now shes not going to be there. Seriously can this school get any worse?

Feel so disgusting. Haven't eaten today. Everyone asked me why i wasn't eating at lunhc, just said i wasn't hungry. My own friend looked at me as if to say lier, you need to eat. But she didn't call me up on it, she knew what...

Ergh can't stand myself. Hate myself so much. Fatfatfatfatfatfatfatfat need to lose weight. Starve Emma, you don't deserve food. You dont deserve anything.


Feel so alone right now. Hate been the only one thats never invited to all these parties. Hate been the only one of my so called friends that doesn't get invited out. Noone wants to spend time with me. Apparently i'm to much effort and...