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Old

"It's just like you don't care"

Posted September 27th 2011 at 09:03 PM by Riddikulus

I'm struggling so badly right now, I just want to hurt myself, to cut all the pain away. My family is falling apart anyway and to make it worse we found out today that my uncle has cancer, I didn't know what to say or how to react and it made it seem like I didn't care but i really do.
I so pathetic, so stupid >_< Need to hurt...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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Old

Just as i thought things were getting better...

Posted September 20th 2011 at 08:11 PM by Riddikulus

What a awful day, crappy day at school, get shouted at for no reason, getting nasty thing said to be by a random user >_<
Plus no one tells me anything, and it's things i probably should have been told...

Just as i thought things were getting better >_<
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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Old

Get me out of here... >_<

Posted September 17th 2011 at 12:21 PM by Riddikulus



>_< I don't want to be here right now, I need to get the hell out.... hurting so badly but no one listens, they don't care :/
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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Old

I wonder why i both sometimes...

Posted September 11th 2011 at 07:00 PM by Riddikulus

Gahh, i'm so fed up..I wonder sometimes why i bother! In the space of 5 mins someone shouted fuck you at me and someone came into chat accusing me of stuff i didn't do.
Everything is my fault lately, i just cause trouble, i don't even know why i'm here anymore :/
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The magic word... expelliarmus
Posted in Uncategorized
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Old

Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.

Posted September 10th 2011 at 10:52 AM by Riddikulus

I don't know what is going on with me lately, I get upset and angry over everything. I find myself lashing out at those close to me and i know they are just trying to help. I love them so much but i'm really not showing it at the moment.
I failed myself again and i cut :/ I just felt like i lost control of myself. My bf doesn't know what to do about me anymore, i guess i'm just too broken...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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Old

Trying is too hard... *trig*

Posted September 7th 2011 at 05:32 PM by Riddikulus




Everything is so hard for me lately, my bf is going through a really hard time with illness in his family and i know i need to be there for him and to support him; but then i can hardly look after myself and support myself at the moment let alone support him too. I'm trying my hardest but i feel like i'm not helping at all.
With everything thats going on with him at the moment i'm so selfish
...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
Posted in Uncategorized
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Old

Thanks Nan..

Posted August 27th 2011 at 03:02 PM by Riddikulus

My nan gave me a letter today basically of things she's always wanted to say to me but has never known how. Some of the things that she said really opened my eyes to everything and made me realise i have to change the way I am at the moment, the one paragraph that keeps going through my head is this: 'Charlotte, I wish you knew how proud I am of you; there is going to be a day soon when I am not going to be here to tell you this but I need you to remember that. You are going to go far but...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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Old

Nice going Charli... >_< *trig*

Posted August 23rd 2011 at 12:25 PM by Riddikulus

OMG Charli, nice going...you're so stupid, pathetic and worthless!
I feeling like crying but i know he'll get annoyed if I do, i'm just being selfish...
Cutting seems to be my only option right now and somewhere he won't see it >_<
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The magic word... expelliarmus
Posted in Uncategorized
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Old

I can't stay strong anymore...

Posted August 13th 2011 at 07:40 PM by Riddikulus

I just want to scream, I want to cut so badly...I want to die. There's no point in anything anymore, I may aswell not be here, at least things wouldn't hurt so much.

Pills have never been so appealling before...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
Posted in Uncategorized
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Old

I wish they cared...

Posted August 12th 2011 at 01:34 PM by Riddikulus

When my parents said they hadn't got me anything for my birthday i thought they were joking lol.
I wish they were at home with me, i don't care about the money or going out for dinner, i just want them both there and that would have been the perfect birthday.

But oh well, it's just another birthday, i'll have plenty more...
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The magic word... expelliarmus
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