APRN, new therapist, and school.

I saw my APRN today, E. I forgot to tell her like everything that I was supposed to tell her because I really don't like talking to her and always just want to get out of there. She seems to think my meds are working decently, and I guess I agree to some extent. I wonder what she'd have said if I told her the rest of what I was supposed to.

I saw my new counselor today too, M. I really like her so far. You know those people that you feel as if you can open up to right away? She was one of them. I was able to answer her questions and even was able to tell her about some of the things like the skin picking and questioning my gender identity. I told her about that one "rollercoaster ride" type episode I have and I think she'll make a note of that and the skin picking thing to tell E. I hope she remembers because I have way too hard of a time opening up to E. I also somehow ended up talking about my dog with M and even though it's been almost three years I cried a little.

I accidentally went on a whole ramble to M about basically not insulting my intelligence or saying I can't do something academically. She'd thought I'd said something offensive, but no. I was just brewing on something. E tends to strike nerves with me unintentionally when it comes to education and while I know it's not what she means, part of what she says makes me feel like she thinks I can't handle 6 classes. I'm sure that's not what she means, but don't insult my intelligence or I will get irritated. As she quickly learned, my education is one of the most important things in the world to me. Then just some other things E says, I'm not three. I wanted M to know right off the bat to not treat me like I'm three.

I found out one of my friends from high school sees the APRN there too. She also has a counselor but we don't have the same counselor. Kind of made me feel less alone.

I hope that M turns out to be a good counselor. I feel so open to her, I don't want that to be let down.

She also definitely did acknowledge the progress I've made since starting college and I like that she did that. She also understood that sometimes I had a hard time explaining things. A lot of the time I tripped over my words or my mouth went faster than my mind, haha.

I felt a bit sad and nervous on Sunday but I think that was sort of to be expected. It was my first day back in the dorms and I was also nervous about classes the next day so.

My first week of classes are going pretty well so far. Illness and Disease is freaking awesome. I don't want to leave that class, seriously. Intro to Public Health seems good too. She talked a lot last class but it should be okay. It's a Monday/Wednesday/Friday class but Monday was canceled due to her security clearance not going through yet, and she doesn't have us come to class on Fridays. She uses it as time to do our homework for the class. Intro to Health Promotion seems like it will be pretty fun too! I've heard the professor is strict and we have to write essays and papers in a different format than I am used to, so I am a little nervous though! Environmental Health is a Monday-only class and she canceled it on Monday due to illness. Next Monday I have off for Martin Luther King day, so I won't actually have her until the 26th, LOL. Statistics is even going okay. I don't have a full grasp YET but I feel okay with asking this professor questions so I'm not feeling too bad yet. He's willing to go over anything you need help with. Creative writing...I'm nervous about that class, not so much because of the writing but because of all the speaking and participation I'll need.

But yeah, things are okay right now I think! Tomorrow's Friday and I get to go home at some point so yay.