No matter what I do
No matter where I go
You’re always there
Always there to remind me that I’m alone
To remind me that there’s no hope
To remind me that it’s my fault
To remind me that I’m lost
To remind me that I'm broken

You’re an evil friend.
But I can't let go.

I decided to make this a blog because that is where it should stay, as a blog that no one looks at.

Okay, so I'm FTM, or somewhere along the lines between being female and male and I move along that a lot. It's not new.

I've FUCKING told my friend to call me George. But NOOOOO. She calls me from my female name. What's with that? I don't call you anything you don't want me to call you, but you won't let me have the happiness of someone I know calling me George?
...

I felt like working on another blog, I mean, I'm not doing anything else.

I'm considering walking around, going to my special place, which is this walk that leads from the grave yard to this little balcony thing, which stares over the ocean. I've never been there alone, but... I want to go a lot, it's just... That place that makes me feel calm. But I know if I go it will be a total waste because, 1) there is still snow so I can't chill on the bench, and 2) It would feel weird to go...

Source: Notice | Facilitated Chat Room Discussions.


There are three scheduled discussions on the topic of Facing the challenges of growing up in the Chat Room for users to seek advice and share thoughts and ideas! The first discussion will be held at 8pm UK time (GMT/UTC), the second will be held at 8pm Eastern US time (EDT), and the third will be held at 8pm...

Source: Newsletter | Issue 24 | If you would like to receive the full quality HTML version via email please sign up.


TeenHelp Newsletter #24 - March 16th 2012 - http://www.teenhelp.org

Welcome to the TeenHelp Newsletter! Our Newsletter contains a lot of useful information about our current work, including updates to our site and services, work with our partners and affiliates, details of upcoming events, short bits of...

Hello!

Just looking at my old blogs and watching four weddings... I want to hit myself on the head. with a hammer. I'm slightly embarrassed, because it's a bit... Yea.

Today I was in the bathroom at school in the middle of the day, and I noticed that I could maybe pass if it wasn't a girls room and no one knew me... But, nope. ^^' I've basically gone to school with a lot of people for plenty of years.

It's always like that, isn't it? You look the way...

My stomach twists with hunger.
But I don't care.
My mom said i could not cut.
What she does not know will not hurt her.
Only me.
I want to be free of this world.
I want to be home with my God.
I wonder why i have to stay here.
I can't do anything right.
I can't help people.
Can i please just leave?

I look happy right? Haha i think thats one of my biggest lies... I'm hardly ever happy.. I wear bright colors and a fake smile that no one can see through.... No one in my family knows that i starve myself... They dont know that i still cut... They think i stop months ago... I did try to stop but i can't.. I dont know if I'll ever be able to.. or if I'll ever be the same again... Right now my only hope is to be skinny and beautiful.. and then when i am that i will be able to stop cutting and that...

I really need someone right now... >_<