TeenHelp - Blog Entries

picking up the pieces. poss trig?

Posted October 7th 2012 at 01:00 PM by escape♥
Updated October 7th 2012 at 01:27 PM by escape♥

Tags almost breakup, boyfriend, crying, cutting, distant, low, sad, self-harm, struggling, tired

E & I fought for the first time last night. At first it was just a stupid habit of mine that was annoying him, but it quickly morphed into something worse. He told me that my sadness is hurting him, and our relationship. I’ve been asking about whether or not it was bothering him recently, and he always denied being in any emotional pain what so ever. When I asked what had changed, he said...

escape♥

Happiness is waiting for you<3

Posted in Rampant Thoughts in the Unforgiving Darkness

Views 1187 Comments 1 escape♥ is offline

Happiness...trig

Posted September 3rd 2012 at 03:58 PM by escape♥

Tags anxiety, depression, eating disorder, happy, past, recovery, self harm, struggling

I want to be able to say I'm happy, and actually mean it. I want to be able to eat a piece of cake, without crying or purging or anything else. I want to not keep finding ways to hurt myself. I slipped up, again. Found another blade, sliced my wrist open. It felt so..amazing. And yet I'm so ashamed. I can't stop wanting to hurt myself. I can't help that I just want to stop breathing, but I don't want to leave E.

I told E that I've only been half-ass trying to recover. I promised I...

escape♥

Happiness is waiting for you<3

Posted in Uncategorized

Views 963 Comments 1 escape♥ is offline

I told you to be fine. triggering

Posted August 18th 2012 at 08:59 PM by escape♥

Tags eating disorder, self harm, self hatred, skinny love, struggling, suicide

Come on skinny love, just last the year.

I slipped up. Sliced my thighs open. It was almost 2 months.

Pour a little salt, we were never here.

I'm scared. The thoughts and urges have never been this bad. E is supposed to come over tomorrow to celebrate my birtday, and he said he's going to take and destroy my blade. I don't know what I'll do with out it.

My my my- my my my- my my my.
Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer.

...

escape♥

Happiness is waiting for you<3

Posted in Rampant Thoughts in the Unforgiving Darkness

Views 826 Comments 1 escape♥ is offline